This not sleeping for almost 9 months is no joke. We do not have the easy baby when it comes to Lotus and her sleep. At first, it started off with feeding her every two hours, then it stretched out and she would be up at least 3 times in the night. My baby did not want to sleep.
Now, I will be honest, I am not one for CIO (cry it out). I am a softy and feel her pain when she cries. Well, then that changed, real quick, around 10 months when we went for a trip out to California to visit my family and see some friends.
My good friend who's daughter is now 4 years old said to Yale, "Now you know she's really not crazy right? She just appears crazy because she's not sleeping. You do know that right?" I was like here is a woman who understands my pain. Little did I know the best was yet to come of this conversation.
"You mean you were crazy too?" Yale says with a half smile of relief.
"Oh yeah, I was a total wack job. Hello, no sleep will do that to the finest of ladies my friend. She will return to you when she gets her sleep." She places her hand on his shoulders. "Now Rain, you have got to let her cry it out. You have got to let her scream her head off. Trust me, you're not hurting her. She wants you to think that she's hurting but, she's not hurting." She said this in a strange plotting voice.
"Right. Okay, I get it and who's going to wake up in the night and tell her mommy still loves her and is not the evil one?" I say with an attitude of top that.
Folks, she was right. I had to let Lotus cry and carry on. Yale, had to sleep lightly and go to her and comfort her from afar and, let her know we both loved her. It was a two day pull my hearts strings period for me. But, she slept. Finally I was getting 7 to 8 hours of good sleep. Oh yeah I was loving it, he was loving it, everybody was loving it.
Then it changed. Lotus was up again teething this time then, a cold. Argh! Just when I was starting to enjoy myself again. So, for us, it has not been easy. However, I do get at least 8 hours of sleep. I am now teaching myself how to sleep again through the night. I was so used to waking up for the last 10 months that my body was conditioned to it.
It gets easier. My suggestions to you are this:
- if you are the primary caretaker ask a friend of partner or baby daddy to put the baby down the first three nights. This allows you to leave the room so he/she doesn't smell you.
- Give a nice feeding before bedtime
- Set up a nice bedtime routine, bath, story time, lullaby
- Don't ignore the cries go in say "I love you, I'm here, It's going to be okay" but do not pick up the baby. Leave the room and continue this until you allow more time between entering the room.
- Don't panic or get upset. This is a baby they are NOT doing this TO YOU. They DON'T KNOW. So be kind to yourselves and them.
- If you need to sleep with your baby. Shoot, Yale has slept on the couch for the sake of having his lady be happy.
If you are having trouble sleeping set up a night time routine for yourself after the baby goes to bed. I am lucky that I have a man who still rubs my feet before bed time. This helps to relax me, and, I am now sleeping much better.